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Accuracy Movement Spreading to Other Memorials

Accuracy Movement Spreading to Other Memorials Jan 17, 2002 (NEW YORK) The New York City Fire Department commissioned a statue of the famous photo of three firemen hoisting an ...

Quick Ones 6

Q. What do you call a virgin on a waterbed? A: A cherry float. Q: What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth? A: 1 US leader Q: What did the sign on the ...

MacGregor the Fence Builder

A Scottish old-timer in Scotland, in a bar, says to a young man, "Lad, look out there to the field. Do ya see that fence? Look how well it's built. I built that fence stone by ...

Sex in the dark

There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the lights. Well, after 20 years the wife ...

The Paratrooper

A paratrooper calls his dad after his first day of paratrooping. His dad asks "So, did you jump?" He says "I will get to that." When he was airborne the drill captain opened ...

PMS

Husbands, please take note! Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands. ...

Quote of the Week (be careful when returning gifts)

"No, no, you didn't! Your sister was in there!" - Marvin Tippery, to his sister Judy Money, upon hearing that she had just returned the decorative box he gave her for ...

Merry Christmas from Your Mother

Merry Christmas From Mom Dear Darling Son and That Person You Married, Merry Christmas to you, and please don't worry. I'm just fine considering I can't breathe or eat. The ...

Politically Correct Holiday Wishes (with warrantee)

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, ...

How many women with PMS...

Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb? A: One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else around here knows HOW to change a light bulb! They ...

Dealing with Customers...

For all of you out there who've had to deal with an irate customer, this is for you. An award should go to the United Airlines agent in Denver for being smart and funny, while ...

The Cruise

An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, ...

Chestnuts roasting on a open fire...

Based on a bet by the other members of his threesome, Everett Sanchez tried to wash his own "balls" in a ball washer at the local golf course. Proving once again that beer ...

25 Proverbs to a Healthier Life

1. If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. 3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going ...

Barbie's letter to Santa

Dear Santa:  Listen you fat little troll, I've been helping you out every year, playing at being the perfect Christmas present, wearing skimpy bathing suits in frigid ...

Good news on proper dieting

Here is some good news on proper dieting... Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats and ...

Detroit Lions News Flash

Lions football practice was delayed on Monday for nearly two hours. One of the players, while on his way to the locker room happened to look down and noticed a suspicious ...

If...

If you take an Oriental man and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented? If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes? ...

 

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