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WHERE DO CONSULTANTS GO WHEN THEY DIE?
There once was a consultant who lived her whole life without ever taking advantage of any of the people she worked for. In fact, she made ...
Viewed 14 times
It may be hard to believe how times have
changed in the last 100 years.
"100 Years Ago"
The average life expectancy in the United States
was forty-seven.
Only 14 ...
Viewed 11 times
An Interesting Discovery. Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one ...
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Two dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up two prostitutes and take them to their separate hotel rooms.
The first dwarf, however, is unable to get an erection. His depression ...
Viewed 10 times
A man with no arms and no legs is out lying on the beach one day,
enjoying his chance to get some sun. All of a sudden, a beautiful woman
walks by and stops. "You poor man," ...
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John Cleese was recently asked on American TV what he thought the
differences between the English and the Americans were.
In reply he said that there were three differences: ...
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"[Some parents] want their Ambers and their Alexanders to
grow up in a cozy womb of non-competition, where everybody
shares tofu, and Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad ...
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In one episode of 'Cheers', Cliff is seated at the bar describing the 'Buffalo Theory' to his buddy Norm. I don't think we've ever heard the concept ...
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Note: The following editorial was written by the late
Gordon Sinclair in 1973. Although some details have
changed since then, the basic sentiments still remain
true ...
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A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna
hear a blonde joke?"
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell
that joke, you should know ...
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Q: What do you call a smart blonde?
A: A golden retriever
Viewed 9 times
How to wash the cat:
1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.
2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water-a strong
industrial solvent often works best-and lift both ...
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"Why a Christmas Tree Is Better Than a Woman"
1. A Christmas tree doesn't care how many other Christmas trees you
have had in the past.
2. Christmas trees don't get mad ...
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A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism.
- Carl Sagan
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Redneck birth control
After having their 11th child, a Missouri couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed. So the husband went to his ...
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A blonde went to her mail box several times before it was even time for the
postman to make his rounds.
A neighbor noticed her repeated trips to the curb and asked if she was ...
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MEN'S 43 RULES FOR WOMEN
1. It is only common courtesy that you should leave the seat on the toilet UP when you are done.
2. If you are cooking a special dinner for a man, be ...
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An elderly couple was watching television, and they only spoke to one another during the commercials. During one of those commercials, the husband asked his wife, "Whatever ...
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Well, it is now the Christmas season, and I think
it is time for the twelve letters of Christmas...
Miss Agnes McHolstein
69 Cash Ave.
Beaver Valley, CO
Dec. 14, ...
Viewed 7 times
But aren't . . . I think your balls are hanging too low. To get it to stand up straight, try propping it against the wall. Santa's sack is really bulging! Did you get ...
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When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...
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A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o'clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the ...
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If only it were this easy...
Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down
and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight. They would ...
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A 6-year-old and a 4-year-old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know
what?" says the 6-year-old. "I think it's about time we start cussing." The
4-year-old nods his head in ...
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