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An Interesting Discovery. Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one ...
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WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (the actual AP headline)
Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her inlaws, and
while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick ...
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Identical twin brothers die at about the same time. One lived a
godly life, good husband and father, reputable businessman,
lots of community service, etc. One was a ...
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TV listing for "The Wizard of Oz"
"Transported to a surreal landscape, a young girl accidentally kills the
first woman she meets, then teams up with three complete strangers ...
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After much careful research, it has been discovered that the artist
Vincent Van Gogh had many relatives. Among them were:
His dizzy aunt - Verti Gogh
The brother who ate ...
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A dwarf with a lisp went to a horse show to buy a mare. He wandered around
until he came across a beautiful mare inside a small enclosure with a farmer
standing at the gate. He ...
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Please ready the following survey titled "Are you a Man?"...
1. In the company of feminists, coitus should be referred to as:
a) lovemaking
b) screwing
c) the pigskin ...
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A few years ago Charlie Brown and the Peanuts gang made a
new friend who developed leukemia in an animated special
entitled, "Why Me, Charlie Brown?"
Recently MetLife put ...
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TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the
income.
AN AMERICAN ...
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One of the best examples of how ridiculous government paperwork can be is
illustrated by a recent case in Louisiana. A company president was trying to
buy some land in ...
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A little boy is at school one day and while he is gone, his cat is killed in traffic. His mother is very concerned about how he will take the news. Upon his arrival home, she ...
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When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...
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I was in the express lane at the store. Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the check-out line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. The ...
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At his morning security meeting G. W. Bush is advised the two Brazilian troops were killed in Iraq yesterday. GW jumps up in horror. "How will I tell the people about this. ...
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A young redhead goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts
wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."
She takes her finger and ...
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Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter said, "I'd like to get you guys in now, but our computer is down. You'll have to go back to ...
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One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all of the rascally behavior
that was going on. He decided to send an angel down to Earth to check it out.
So he called one of ...
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Here are some new taglines collected from various dark corners of the
Internet...
Mary Shafer of NASA Ames has said, "Insisting on perfect safety is for
people who don't ...
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Winners of a New York Magazine contest who were asked to take a
well known expression in a foreign language, change a single letter
and provide a definition for the new ...
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1. Ahhh... I see the f_ck-up fairy has visited us again...
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for ...
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Right before Christmas I was rushing around trying to get some last minute shopping done. I was stressed out and not thinking very fondly of the Christmas season right then. It was ...
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At a car dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
Sign over a gynecologist's office
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
At a military ...
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A Scottish old-timer in Scotland, in a bar, says to a young man, "Lad, look
out there to the field. Do ya see that fence? Look how well it's built. I
built that fence stone by ...
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Pinocchio had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain
about splinters when they were making love. Pinocchio, therefore,
went to visit Ghepetto to see if he could help. ...
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