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Hot Dog

Viewed 11 times
Hotdog

Top ten things only women understand (variation)

Viewed 9 times
Top Ten Things Only Women Understand: 10. Why it's good to have five pairs of black shoes. 9. The difference between cream, ivory, and off-white. 8. Crying can be fun. ...

Why a Christmas Tree Is Better Than...

Viewed 9 times
"Why a Christmas Tree Is Better Than a Woman" 1. A Christmas tree doesn't care how many other Christmas trees you have had in the past. 2. Christmas trees don't get mad ...

Dog Dancing

Viewed 8 times
Disco Dog Dancing at its finest…

Santa's Little Helpers

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I suppose this explains why he's always so jolly...
Santa's little helpers

PMS

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Husbands, please take note! Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands. ...

Bumper Stickers 2

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Seen on the back of a biker's vest: If you can read this, my wife fell off. Horn Broken, Watch for Finger If you can read this, please flip me back over... (seen upside down, ...

Take five minutes and chuckle

Viewed 7 times
Every year, English teachers from across the country can submit their collections of actual similes and metaphors found in high school essays. These excerpts are published each ...

Holiday Eating Tips

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1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where ...

Anger Management

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When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...

Life's Rules

Viewed 7 times
1. There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and Shithead's. 2. The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content. 3. I live in my own little world, ...

48 phrases we wish we could say at work

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1. Ahhh... I see the f_ck-up fairy has visited us again... 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for ...

Holmes and Watson

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine they lay down for the night, and went to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes awoke and ...

Titanic

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The Titanic, on her maiden voyage, just set sail from the shores of England. It was the most magnificent ship ever built, and everybody is very excited. No expense has been ...

Chickens, Roads and Operating Systems

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In the PC World, how does a chicken cross the road? NT Chicken: Will cross the road in June. No, August. September for sure. OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ...

An Elephant's Memory

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Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya, after graduating from Northwestern University, same place my dad went to school. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull ...

Christmas Lights

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Merry Christmas...

The Guys' Rules

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At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear"the rules" from the female ...

Cleaning Problems

Viewed 6 times
DEAR TIDE LAUNDRY DETERGENT: I'm writing to say what an excellent product you have. I've used it since the beginning of married life, when my Mom told me it was the best. ...

Before it starts...

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A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts." She looked a little puzzled, but ...

If Bush get's elected, I'll leave the country...

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Ever wonder what happened to all those celebrities who promised to leave the country if George W. Bush was elected president? The original statements: Eddie Vedder - "I'm ...

Famous Quotes on Sex

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Tom Clancy: "I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy." Steve Martin: "You know 'that look' women get when they want sex? ...

Barbie's letter to Santa

Viewed 6 times
Dear Santa:  Listen you fat little troll, I've been helping you out every year, playing at being the perfect Christmas present, wearing skimpy bathing suits in frigid ...

 

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