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Raunchy One Liners

Viewed 17 times
What's the difference between a bitch and a whore? A whore sleeps with everyone at the party and a bitch sleeps with everyone at the party except you. What's the ...

Tales of the Non-Technology Inclined

Viewed 10 times
COMPUTER, POWER STRIP  I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not ...

Windows Start

Viewed 8 times
A revised version of the default Windows startup sound…

Cat Carrier

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Cat Carrier

Christmas Songs

Viewed 7 times
Who wrote the Christmas song "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year"?

Breaking News

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News services are reporting that Osama bin Laden has been captured by U.S. Special Forces. In a covert operation, the entire country of Afghanistan was sprayed with Viagra ...

Mental Health Hotline

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Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline... If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If ...

The nursing home...

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An old lady in a nursing home is wheeling up and down the halls in her wheelchair making sounds like she's driving a car. As she's going down the hall an old man jumps out of a ...

A Good Pun Is Its Own Reward

Viewed 6 times
Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery.  A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.  A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.  My wife really ...

TAZER PRACTICE

Viewed 6 times
From a State Trooper in Garland, TX: Friends, My wife Toni is fond of saying that my last words on this earth will be something akin to, "Hey y'all, hold my beer and watch ...

New Study

Viewed 6 times
A study in London showed that the kind of "male face" a woman finds attractive can differ depending on where a woman is in her menstrual cycle. For instance, if she is ...

Things I MUST remember when I come back as a dog...

Viewed 6 times
1. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. 2. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table. 3. I will not roll my toys behind ...

Rules for Golf or...

Viewed 6 times
Top Ten Suggestions for Guys While Playing Golf and/or Taking a Leak in a Public Bathroom 10. Back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart. 9. Form a loose grip. ...

Blonde Joke 17

Viewed 6 times
A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind ...

Golf 3

Viewed 6 times
Moses, Jesus, and another guy were out playing golf in Heaven one day. Moses pulled up to the tee and drove a long one. It landed in the fairway but rolled directly toward a ...

Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans

Viewed 5 times
1. Blaming your farts on me....not funny...not funny at all!  2. Yelling at me for barking. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!  3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me ...

Things that sound dirty at Christmas...

Viewed 5 times
But aren't . . . I think your balls are hanging too low. To get it to stand up straight, try propping it against the wall. Santa's sack is really bulging! Did you get ...

At last, the perfect Christmas card

Viewed 5 times
Dear recipient, Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender ...

3 AM

Viewed 5 times
A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o'clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the ...

Texas Preacher

Viewed 5 times
The Texas preacher rose with an angry red face. "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one which a ...

Santa's Little Helpers

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I suppose this explains why he's always so jolly...
Santa's little helpers

Short Cowboy

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There was a midget (little person) down in Texas whose testicles ached almost all the time. The midget went to the doctor and told him what the problem was. The doctor told ...

 

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