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Douglas Adams Quotes

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Douglas Adams Quotes... Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. In the beginning the Universe was ...

Love Story

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I SHALL SEEK AND FIND YOU... I SHALL TAKE YOU TO BED AND HAVE MY WAY WITH YOU... I WILL MAKE YOU ACHE, SHAKE AND SWEAT UNTIL YOU MOAN AND GROAN. I WILL MAKE YOU BEG FOR ...

Ass size

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In a survey, 80 percent of women thought their ass was too fat, 15 percent said their ass was too thin, and the other five percent said they didn't care - they would have ...

A Moral Question

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I have a moral question for you. This is an imaginary situation, but I think it is fun to decide what one would do. The situation: You are in the Middle East, and there is a ...

I want to slap Martha Stewart.

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Dear Santa, I rarely ask for much. This year is no exception. I don't need diamond earrings, handy slicer-dicers or comfy slippers. I only want one little thing, and I want ...

Philosophy 101

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Keep this philosophy in mind the next time you either hear or are about to repeat a rumor. In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day the ...

Presidential Quotes

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What US president once said "It is a good thing I am not a woman, as I would always be pregnant, for I cannot say no"

Breaking News

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News services are reporting that Osama bin Laden has been captured by U.S. Special Forces. In a covert operation, the entire country of Afghanistan was sprayed with Viagra ...

Trivia 2

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A cat has 32 muscles in each ear. A dime has 118 ridges around the edge. A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours. A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why. ...

For Sale

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Sven was going for his morning walk one day when he walked past Ole's house and saw a sign that said, "Boat For Sale." This confused Sven because he knew that Ole didn't own a ...

After Bar Closing

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One night, a police officer was stalking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving-under-the-influence laws. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble ...

Santa

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santa

Bull

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A cattle rancher needs a bull to service his cows but needs to borrow the breeding fee from the bank. The banker lends him the money and comes by a week later to see how ...

Trucker

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As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window, and she says ...

How to find bin Laden.

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The CIA has a new tactic. It is following Jane Fonda - she has been dating the guy for six months.

Evil Math

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The following pseudo-mathematical proof was posted to rec.games.board: What about this: We know that women like two things, your time and your money, therefore... women ...

Quote of the week 8

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Quote of the week "I think he's got quite the balls to open up a store nude.'' - Toronto city councilor George Mammoliti, referring to store owner Malcolm Scott's practice ...

Buddy learns a new trick...

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Ya know, just make up your own joke here...
buddy

Idiots...

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IDIOTS ARE EVERYWHERE. HERE ARE SOME PLACES TO FIND THEM: IDIOTS AT WORK: I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never ...

How old do you feel

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How Old Do You Feel? To get an idea of the lives of those entering college this fall, read on......... and try not to laugh............... 1. The people who are starting ...

Bill Sux at .18 Microns

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API - Time Magazine reports an interesting case of high-tech graffiti. It seems that a couple of Intel engineers working on the design of a recent version of the Pentium ...

Interesting statistic from a DC Analyst in Training

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If you consider that there has been an average of 160,000 troops in the Iraq theater of operations during the last 22  months, and a total of 2112 deaths, that  gives a ...

 

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