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Anger Management

Viewed 19 times
When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...

Computer Problems

Viewed 16 times
I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Rick the computer guy, to come over. Rick clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum ...

10 Things you would NEVER hear a Southerner say

Viewed 15 times
10 Things you would NEVER hear a Southerner say: 10) "I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex" 9) Duct tape won't fix that 8) Come to think of it I'll have a Heiniken's ...

An Elephant's Memory

Viewed 13 times
Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya, after graduating from Northwestern University, same place my dad went to school. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull ...

Hearing problem

Viewed 13 times
Elmer, an 80 year-old stumbled into the doctor's office all excited and in a tither. "doc .. I've lost my hearing!" Elmer yelled. "let's examine the problem," the doc said. ...

Star Trek TNG Meets Microsoft

Viewed 12 times
Star Trek TNG Meets Microsoft Picard: Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your attempts at finding a weakness in the Borg? And Mr. Data, have you been able to access ...

New Element Discovered

Viewed 11 times
An Interesting Discovery. Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium  (symbol=Gv), has one ...

Things that sound dirty at Christmas...

Viewed 11 times
But aren't . . . I think your balls are hanging too low. To get it to stand up straight, try propping it against the wall. Santa's sack is really bulging! Did you get ...

New virus alert

Viewed 11 times
Just wanted to warn everyone there's a new virus -code name is "Work." If you receive "Work" from your colleagues, your boss, or any one else, do not touch "Work" under any ...

20 thinnest books

Viewed 11 times
The top 20 thinnest books 20. HOW TO LAND A PLANE AT MARTHA'S VINEYARD - by JFK, Jr. 19. HOW TO PLEASE WOMEN - by John Bobbit 18. MY PLAN TO FIND THE REAL KILLERS-by O. ...

20 reasons why chocolate is better than sex

Viewed 11 times
TOP TWENTY REASONS WHY CHOCOLATE IS BETTER THAN SEX: 1) You can GET chocolate. 2) "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate. 3) Chocolate ...

Interesting statistic from a DC Analyst in Training

Viewed 10 times
If you consider that there has been an average of 160,000 troops in the Iraq theater of operations during the last 22  months, and a total of 2112 deaths, that  gives a ...

Cussing

Viewed 10 times
A 6-year-old and a 4-year-old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?" says the 6-year-old. "I think it's about time we start cussing." The 4-year-old nods his head in ...

48 phrases we wish we could say at work

Viewed 10 times
1. Ahhh... I see the f_ck-up fairy has visited us again... 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for ...

Mental Health Hotline

Viewed 10 times
Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline... If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If ...

Tales of the Non-Technology Inclined

Viewed 10 times
COMPUTER, POWER STRIP  I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not ...

20 Ways To Confuse Santa Claus

Viewed 10 times
20 Ways To Confuse Santa Claus Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds. While he's in the ...

Capitalism and Cows

Viewed 10 times
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income. AN AMERICAN ...

A Redneck Christmas

Viewed 10 times

You know you're a Floridian if...

Viewed 9 times
You know you're a Floridian if... Socks are only for bowling. You never use an umbrella because you know the rain will be over in five minutes. A good parking place has ...

The Druggist

Viewed 9 times
A lady walks into the drug store and asks the druggist for some arsenic. The druggist asks "Ma'am, what do you want with arsenic?" The lady say's "To kill my husband." ...

Douglas Adams Quotes

Viewed 9 times
Douglas Adams Quotes... Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. In the beginning the Universe was ...

100 fun ways to order pizza

Viewed 9 times
100 FUN WAYS TO PHONE IN A PIZZA ORDER 1. If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that. 2. Make up a ...

MS buys Catholic Church

Viewed 9 times
MICROSOFT Bids to Acquire Catholic Church By Hank Vorjes VATICAN CITY (AP) - In a joint press conference in St. Peter's Square this morning, MICROSOFT Corp. and the Vatican ...

 

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