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Here's a Riddle for You:
Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one.
Michael J. Fox has a small one.
Madonna doesn't have one.
The Pope has one but doesn't use it.
The ...
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When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...
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Sixteen reasons why airplanes are easier to live with than women:
1) Airplanes usually kill you quickly, a woman takes her time.
2) Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a ...
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A little old man shuffled slowly...
into an ice cream parlor.
He pulled himself slowly...
painfully...
up onto a stool...
After catching his breath...
he ordered a ...
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My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, "This will make you
happy tonight." He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it
all over the doorknobs. ...
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A teacher cautiously approaches the subject of sex education with her fourth grade class because she realizes Little Johnny's propensity for sexual innuendo. But Johnny remains ...
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TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the
income.
AN AMERICAN ...
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A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around looking for valuables, and when he picked up a VCR to place in his sack, a strange, disembodied voice echoed ...
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This is a rather large guy I know who typed these observations from an airplane... ok this is the up date from the airplane. ya ya i know you aint supposed to use the internet from ...
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LETTER FROM A FARM KID, NOW AT SAN DIEGO MARINE CORPS RECRUIT DEPOT
Dear Ma and Pa:
I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats ...
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MessageContributed by: Deborah Twonames
Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of
Tampax and proceeded to the check-out counter.
The man at the ...
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April 1st
1778 Oliver Pollock, creates the dollar sign.
1863 The first wartime conscription law goes into effect in the United States.
1865 At the Battle of Five Forks, ...
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It's the first day of school and the teacher thought she'd get to know the
kids by asking them their name and what their father does for a living.
The first little girl says: ...
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Michael Jackson describes his September 11th experience in the March issue of Vibe... "I was in New York (after performing at Madison Square Garden on Sept. 7 and 10), and I got ...
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Little Johnny and Susie are only ten years old, but they're sure they're in
love and decided they wanted to get married.
Little Johnny bravely approached Susie's father and ...
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Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to
people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that
homosexuality is an abomination according to ...
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After much careful research, it has been discovered that the artist
Vincent Van Gogh had many relatives. Among them were:
His dizzy aunt - Verti Gogh
The brother who ate ...
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A farmer got pulled over by a state trooper for speeding, and the
trooper started to lecture the farmer about his speed, and in general
began to throw his weight around to try ...
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Years ago, CBS had a popular little series called GILLIGAN'S ISLAND. There is, however, a dark secret about this "comedy" you may never have realized. The island is a direct ...
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THINGS YOU CAN'T SAY WITH A HALLMARK
"Looking back over the years that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder: What the f_ck was I thinking"
"Congratulations on your ...
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You know you work in corporate America in the 90's if:
1. You've sat at the same desk for 4 years and worked for three different companies.
2. Your company welcome sign is ...
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FINALLY... THE TRUE STORY...
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God,
"Lord, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you've created me ...
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For anyone who spends any time at all in hotels...
"What to do with Hotel Soap"
Ever have one of those days?
The following letters are taken from an actual incident ...
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Did you hear about the new 3 Million dollar Arkansas State lottery?
The winner gets 3 dollars a year for a million years.
++++++++++++++
What does a divorce in ...
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