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Boot Camp

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LETTER FROM A FARM KID, NOW AT SAN DIEGO MARINE CORPS RECRUIT DEPOT Dear Ma and Pa: I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats ...

Only in America

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A man is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull. He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He succeeds in ...

Time

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On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower ...

Santa's Little Helpers

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I suppose this explains why he's always so jolly...
Santa's little helpers

Cat Carrier

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Cat Carrier

TOP 10 MARKETING SLOGANS FOR VIAGRA

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TOP 10 MARKETING SLOGANS FOR VIAGRA: 10. Viagra, The quicker dicker upper 9. Viagra, One-a-day, like iron 8. Viagra, When it absolutely, positively has to be there ...

EVIL MUTANT ATTACK SQUIRREL OF DEATH

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Mike never dreamed that slowly cruising on his Harley Davidson Fat-Boy motorcycle through a residential neighborhood could be so incredibly dangerous! Little did Mike suspect. Mike ...

Further proof that the human race is doomed

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In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods... 1. On Sears hairdryer: "Do ...

Heavy Thinker

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It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social ...

48 phrases we wish we could say at work

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1. Ahhh... I see the f_ck-up fairy has visited us again... 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for ...

Little Johnny (getting married)

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Little Johnny and Susie are only ten years old, but they're sure they're in love and decided they wanted to get married. Little Johnny bravely approached Susie's father and ...

A MAN'S ANSWERS TO EVERY QUESTION A WOMAN EVER ASKS

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1. WHY ARE MEN SUCH JERKS? It's a testosterone thing. Much similar to your PMS thing, we men suffer from testosterone poisoning. Why do you think the average life span of a ...

Embarrassing Moments 2

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Oh balls... I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was ...

Going Fishing

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A man calls home to his wife and says, Honey I have been asked to go fishing at a big lake up in Canada with my boss and several of his friends. We'll be gone for a week. ...

Interview

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The executive was interviewing a young blonde for a position in his company. He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, "If you could have a ...

Donald Rumsfeld Quotes

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Congress, the press, and the bureaucracy too often focus on how much money or effort is spent, rather than whether the money or effort actually achieves the announced goal. When ...

Jet Fuel

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A couple of drinking buddies who are airplane mechanics are in the hanger at JFK airport in New York; it's fogged over and they have nothing to do. One of them says to the ...

Stefan and Grandpa

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Stefan and Grandpa: Stefan and his grandfather are fishing. Granddad pulls out a beer and the little boy says "Grandpa, can I have one of those?" Grandpa says "Is your penis ...

Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans

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1. Blaming your farts on me....not funny...not funny at all!  2. Yelling at me for barking. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!  3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me ...

Anger Management

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When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...

Quick Ones 4

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1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit? Unique Up On It 2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit? Tame Way, Unique Up On It 3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest? ...

Three Morals

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A while back, there were two kingdoms situated close by each other. One kingdom had a powerful king, and the other had a relatively weak king. The difference, or so everybody ...

Class of 2006

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Once again, Beloit College has found new ways to make us feel old... Beloit, Wis. - In the coming weeks, a new generation of students will arrive on campuses throughout the ...

 

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