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Added 2/7/2002
At a car dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
Sign over a gynecologist's office
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
At a military ...
Added 2/2/2002
After getting nailed by a Daisy Cutter, Osama made his way
to the pearly gates. There, George Washington greets him:
"How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" yells ...
Added 1/31/2002
A blonde was driving home after work, and got caught in a really bad
hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to a
repair shop. The shop owner saw ...
Added 1/30/2002
Michael Jackson describes his September 11th experience in the March issue of Vibe... "I was in New York (after performing at Madison Square Garden on Sept. 7 and 10), and I got ...
Added 1/27/2002
Candidate Gives Viagra, Calls for Nation to Rise
BOGOTA, Colombia (Reuters) - Promising to invigorate Colombians in the
struggle against war and corruption, a presidential ...
Added 1/25/2002
"There is a product in the ink which, if you ingest 400 notes become toxic.
So, besides being expensive, it is not recommendable to eat Euro notes."
- Eugenio Domingo, ...
Added 1/20/2002
An elderly couple is enjoying an anniversary dinner together in a small
tavern. The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the
first time we had sex together ...
Added 1/18/2002
I am a teapot
Here is handle, here is spout
I am a teapot
Mary had a lamb
Followed her to school one day
Children laughed and played
There were three blind ...
Added 1/18/2002
"After the lights were on and I saw a butt naked guy on my table I thought,
'Wow, this is weirder than I thought.' "
- unidentified homeowner in Muncie, Indiana, after ...
Added 1/17/2002
Accuracy Movement Spreading to Other Memorials
Jan 17, 2002
(NEW YORK) The New York City Fire Department commissioned a statue of the famous photo of three firemen hoisting an ...
Added 1/17/2002
Q. What do you call a virgin on a waterbed?
A: A cherry float.
Q: What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
A: 1 US leader
Q: What did the sign on the ...
Added 1/17/2002
Accuracy Movement Spreading to Other Memorials
Jan 17, 2002
(NEW YORK) The New York City Fire Department commissioned a statue of the famous photo of three firemen hoisting ...
Added 1/13/2002
A Scottish old-timer in Scotland, in a bar, says to a young man, "Lad, look
out there to the field. Do ya see that fence? Look how well it's built. I
built that fence stone by ...
Added 1/10/2002
There was this couple that had been married for 20 years.
Every time they made love the husband always insisted on
shutting off the lights.
Well, after 20 years the wife ...
Added 1/10/2002
A paratrooper calls his dad after his first day of paratrooping. His dad
asks "So, did you jump?" He says "I will get to that."
When he was airborne the drill captain opened ...
Added 1/7/2002
Husbands, please take note!
Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a
man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands.
...
Added 1/1/2002
"No, no, you didn't! Your sister was in there!"
- Marvin Tippery, to his sister Judy Money, upon hearing that she had just
returned the decorative box he gave her for ...
Added 12/30/2001
Merry Christmas From Mom
Dear Darling Son and That Person You Married,
Merry Christmas to you, and please don't worry. I'm just fine considering I
can't breathe or eat. The ...
Added 12/24/2001
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an
environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive,
gender neutral, ...
Added 12/21/2001
Be advised that terrorists may attempt to pass themselves off as ordinary American citizens and may even attempt to change their hair color, wardrobe or appearance in order to ...
Added 12/19/2001
Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else around here knows HOW to change a light bulb! They ...
Added 12/18/2001
For all of you out there who've had to deal with an irate customer, this
is for you. An award should go to the United Airlines agent in Denver for
being smart and funny, while ...
Added 12/17/2001
An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat
on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind.
A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, ...
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