Index
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An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat
on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind.
A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, ...
A worried father confronted his daughter one night. "I don't like that
new boyfriend, he's rough and common and bloody stupid with it."
"Oh no, Daddy," the daughter replied, ...
Things done in history that had to wait until after April Fools Day so everyone would take them seriously.
April 2
1792 The United States authorizes the minting of the $10 ...
Question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes ...
Divorcing After 45 Years An elderly man in Phoenix
calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin
your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and
I are divorcing; ...
They always ask at the doctor's office why you are there, and you have to answer in front of others what's wrong and sometimes it is embarrassing. There's nothing worse ...
A butcher is working, and really busy. He notices a dog in his shop and shoos him away. Later, he notices the dog is back again. He walks over to the dog, and notices ...
A lady walks into the drug store and asks the druggist
for some arsenic.
The druggist asks "Ma'am, what do you want with
arsenic?"
The lady say's "To kill my husband."
...
A mother is with her 5 year old boy at the zoo when they reach the
elephant cage. The 5 year old boy looks with amazement at the large
beast and says to his mom, "What's that ...
Here's one you can debate at church:
There were three good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Fathers business .
2. He lived at home until he was 33. ...
Note: The actual origins of this bit of history/folklore are still not
clear, but evidence suggests that the source may be Click and Clack: The
Tappet Brothers (a.k.a. Tom and ...
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly
gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "you must each
possess something that ...
A woman is in bed with her lover who also happens to be her
husband's best friend. They make love for hours, and
afterwards, while they're just laying there, the phone rings. ...
There was a fly buzzing around a barn one day when he happened on a
pile of fresh cow manure. Due to the fact that it had been hours since
his last meal, he flew down and began ...
A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a Genie's
lamp. She picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold a Genie
appeared.
The amazed woman asked if she ...
"You teach a child to read and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test"
- George W. Bush, at an education event in Townsend, Tennessee.
DEAR Diary... For Christmas this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Since I know I need to get in shape I decided ...
The Gift
A young man wanted to purchase a gift for his new sweetheart's birthday
and as they had not been dating very long, after careful
consideration, he decided a pair of ...
A guy went into a bar and met a nice girl. They have a few drinks and soon wound up at his place, in bed. They're having a great time. She was on top when suddenly she had an ...
THE GOOD, THE BAD and THE UGLY
Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids
Bad: You can't find your birth control pills
Ugly: Your daughter borrowed them
Good: ...
The Great Writer
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that ...
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear"the rules" from the female ...
THE HIGH PRICE OF GASOLINE
So, you think a gallon of gasoline is expensive?
Well, here are a few things that Autoweek brought attention to compare.
This is what it costs to ...
It was opening night at the theatre and people came from miles around to
see the famed hypnotist do his stuff. As the hypnotist took to the stage,
he announced,
"Unlike most ...
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