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Added 11/16/1999
A Blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer.
She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow
$5,000.
The bank ...
Added 11/14/1999
The San Francisco Zoo has an elephant named Calle who has a chronic illness,
requiring medication. The zoo people couldn't get Calle to take her dose
orally, so a California ...
Added 11/12/1999
Happy Halloween
A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween party. She got a
terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being
a devoted ...
Added 11/10/1999
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY -
Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures.
Remember, when someone annoys you,
it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown,
BUT, it only ...
Added 11/9/1999
Prayer for the Stressed
God, Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,The
courage to change the things I cannot accept, And the wisdom to hide
the bodies ...
Added 11/8/1999
Three Labrador Retrievers - a brown, yellow and black - are sitting in the
waiting room at the vet's office when they strike up a conversation. The
black lab turns to the brown ...
Added 11/8/1999
Some Things You Probably Didn't Learn In School Or College:
The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television
were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
Coca Cola ...
Added 11/5/1999
A drunk walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Bartender, buy everyone in the house a drink, pour yourself one, and give me the bill."
So, the bartender does just that and ...
Added 11/3/1999
Setting Company Policy........
Start with a cage containing five apes. In the cage, hang a banana on a string and put stairs under it. Before long, an ape will go to the stairs ...
Added 11/3/1999
Our story begins at the Olympics, specifically the wrestling event.
It is narrowed down to the Russian or the American for the gold medal.
Before the final match, the American ...
Added 11/2/1999
Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a
State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to
himself, "This driver is just as ...
Added 10/30/1999
Some of you have voiced that Engineers are a different breed....Perhaps the
following will help you understand us.....
Comprehending Engineers - Take One
Two engineering ...
Added 10/27/1999
How to wash the cat:
1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.
2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water-a strong
industrial solvent often works best-and lift both ...
Added 10/25/1999
Two guys are bungee-jumping one day. The first guy says to the second, "You know, we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico." The second guy ...
Added 10/25/1999
You know you are from Michigan when:
- You own only three spices - salt, pepper and ketchup
- You design your Halloween costumes to fit over a snowsuit
- You have more ...
Added 10/21/1999
Phases of Life for an IT Professional Phase 1: As a Junior Programmer you're in awe of how smart your superiors and colleagues are. Phase 2: As a Mid-level Programmer you ...
Added 10/19/1999
TOP 20 SAYINGS WE'D LIKE TO SEE ON THOSE OFFICE INSPIRATIONAL POSTERS:
* Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by
killing all those who opposed ...
Added 10/19/1999
REASONS WHY TRICK OR TREATING IS BETTER THAN SEX
10) You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.
9) If you get tired, you can wait 10 minutes and go ...
Added 10/19/1999
Have you ever worked in an office where someone insisted upon listening to their voice mail using the speakerphone (at full volume, naturally). It can really begin to bother you ...
Added 10/18/1999
An 80-year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor
asked him how he was feeling.
"I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an eighteen
year old bride ...
Added 10/13/1999
Are you a prostitute or a software consultant…
1. You work very odd hours.
2. You are paid a lot of money to keep your client
happy.
3. You are paid well
Added 10/12/1999
TOP TEN INDICATORS THAT YOU'VE JOINED A CHEAP HMO 10. Annual breast exam conducted at Hooters. 9. Directions to your doctor's office include "take a left when you enter ...
Added 10/12/1999
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She
started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!"
After a few seconds, Little ...
Added 10/4/1999
A husband and wife were out playing golf. They tee off and one drive goes to the right and one drive goes to the left. The wife finds her ball in a patch of buttercups. She grabs a ...
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