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On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia:
Here lies
Ezekial Aikle
Age 102
The Good
Die Young.
In a London, England cemetery:
Ann ...
Exercise program for Those Of Us Getting On in Years.
I thought I would let you in on a little secret I've found
for building arm and shoulder muscles. You might wish to adopt ...
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED
1. Raising teenagers is like nailing JELLO to a tree.
2. There is always a lot to be thankful for if you take
time to look ...
Bill Clinton, Bill Gates, and Al Gore were in an airplane that crashed. They're up in heaven, and God's sitting on the great white throne.
God addressed Al first. "Al, what do ...
A woman wants the inside of her house painted, so she calls a contractor
In to help her. They wander around the house, and she points out the colors
she wants. She says, "Now ...
Q. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
A. Slow down and use a lubricant.
Q. What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild?
A. Money
...
Just in case you've had a rough day, here's a stress management
technique. Recommended in all the latest psychological texts.
The funny thing is that it really works...
1. ...
Did you know that Bill Clinton is considering changing the Democratic seal
from a donkey to a condom, because it represents inflation, halts
production, and gives you a false ...
A guy stuck his head into a barber shop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About 2 hours." The guy ...
Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners. He turns a corner and sees a building with the sign, "Hans ...
Happy Halloween
A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween party. She got a
terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being
a devoted ...
An elderly woman goes to the doctor and asks his help to revive her
husband's sex drive. "What about trying Viagra?" asks the doctor.
"Not a chance," says Mrs. Murphy. "He ...
Happy Jan. 20th... Which is also known as...
Feast Day of St. Paula the Bearded
According to fourth-century legend, Paula was pursued by an enraptured youth into a church, ...
An engineer, of the Harley Davidson Motorcycle Corporation, died and
went to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter told him, "You've been a good
man and your motorcycles have changed ...
1. Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they don't realize it. 2. Set all the alarm clocks to go ...
Two buddies were sitting at the bar in a singles' club
and talking about another guy who was sitting at the
other end of the bar.
"I don't get it," complained the first guy, ...
Legless Man Wanted in Pants Heist
- Rueters recently reported that a man with no legs is wanted in West Vancouver for allegedly stealing 10 pairs of pants from The Gap. They ...
ACTUAL NEWS HEADLINES
GATORS TO FACE SEMINOLES WITH PETERS OUT
The Tallahassee Bugle
MESSIAH CLIMAXES IN CHORUS OF HALLELUJAHS
The Anchorage Alaska Times
...
- Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge
- Deer Kill 17,000
- Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
- Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge
- New Study of Obesity ...
Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. ...
Elmer, an 80 year-old stumbled into the doctor's office all
excited and in a tither.
"doc .. I've lost my hearing!" Elmer yelled.
"let's examine the problem," the doc said. ...
This will warm your heart. Just when you lost faith in human kindness:
Someone who teaches at a Middle School in Safety Harbor, Florida forwarded
the following letter. The ...
I usually don't forward these little heart warmers, but thought this one is worth reading.
This is truly a heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little girl and ...
Heaven is when you have…
an American salary
a British home
Chinese food
a Swiss economy
an Italian body
Japanese technology
an African tool
an Indian wife ...
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