Humor
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Words wives uses on their husbands...
FINE
This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are
right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to ...
Thursday July 5 1:43 PM ET
Missouri Man Bakes Fireworks, Blows Up Kitchen
KANSAS CITY, Mo. (Reuters) - Fireworks hidden in a Kansas City man's
oven turned out to be a ...
Friday January 26 12:27 PM ET
Police Not Amused by Breakfast Prank
DALLAS (Reuters) - A police dispatcher who tasted something funny when
she bit into a breakfast tortilla ...
"But we're not homophobic... we are compassionate towards anyone who
wants to try and give up that kind of lifestyle."
- The Rev Dr. Glenn Davies, rector of St Luke's, Sydney, ...
OB-GYN - Most Embarrassing Moment
This is a laugh for all those women out there (and the men who love
them) who so look forward to that wonderful time once a year when they ...
Childrens Book Titles You'll Never See
You Were an Accident
Strangers Have the Best Candy
The Little Sissy Who Snitched
Some Kittens Can Fly!
The Protocols of the ...
Martha's way #1: Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone
to prevent ice cream drips.
My way: Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for ...
There was a blond bowling team and a brunette bowling team and they
rented a double decker bus to take them to the bowling alley. The blond
team sat in the upper level, and the ...
I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have
decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an eight
year-old again.
I want to go to ...
A man with no arms and no legs is out lying on the beach one day,
enjoying his chance to get some sun. All of a sudden, a beautiful woman
walks by and stops. "You poor man," ...
When Jane initially met Tarzan in the jungle, she was very, very
attracted to him, and during her questions about his life she asked him
how he managed for sex.
"Tarzan not ...
The Mysteries of Life
1. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
2. Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
3. Why can't women put ...
A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following
exchange:
Officer: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I ...
Some NEW Barbie dolls to coincide with her and
our aging gracefully.
1. Bifocals Barbie. Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion
frames in six wild colors ...
HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY
1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car
with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer
at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2) ...
When white man found this land, Indians were running it...
* No Taxes...
* No Debt...
* Plenty Buffalo...
* Plenty beaver!
* Women did most of the work.
* ...
Actual tourist questions as complied by the Tampa Bay Convention &
Visitors Bureau...
- Is Sunday brunch only served on Sunday?
- My sister always wanted to come to ...
The new French Foreign Legion captain was assigned to a remote post
in the desert. During his first inspection, he noticed a camel hitched up
behind the mess tent.
He asks ...
A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in front of his
office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck
passed too close and completely tore ...
The police academy instructor was conducting an in-class survey,
questioning three blonde female officers who were training to become
detectives. To test their skills in ...
Yesterday, I heard from a drug rep for Glaxo who told me that they are
on the verge of launching a new herbal remedy that they think will take
the market by storm. This drug ...
Just turned 50...
A man has reached middle age when he is cautioned
to slow down by his doctor instead of by the police.
Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow ...
ONLY IN AMERICA
Only in America... can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance...
Only in America... are there handicap parking places in front of a
skating ...
Q What's a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.
Q. What's the height of conceit?
A. Having an orgasm and calling out ...
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