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One day, the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on each Friday, she will ask a question to the class and anyone who answers correctly doesn't have ...
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A very wealthy man, old and desperately ill, summons to his bedside his three closest advisors: his doctor, his priest, and his lawyer. "I know," he says, they say 'you can't take ...
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Links to other sources of questionable humor and arcane knowledge
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A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV,
and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts."
She looked a little puzzled, but ...
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Michael Jackson describes his September 11th experience in the March issue of Vibe... "I was in New York (after performing at Madison Square Garden on Sept. 7 and 10), and I got ...
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ALBERT EINSTEIN'S RIDDLE
ARE YOU IN THE TOP 2% OF INTELLIGENT PEOPLE IN THE WORLD?
SOLVE THE RIDDLE AND FIND OUT.
There are no tricks, just pure logic, so good luck and ...
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The bartender was washing his glasses, when an elderly Irishman came in. With great difficulty, the Irishman hoisted his bad leg over the barstool, pulled himself up painfully, and ...
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Things You Should NEVER Say When Stopped by the Police!
1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't ...
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20 Ways To Confuse Santa Claus
Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds.
While he's in the ...
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A man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the ...
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TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the
income.
AN AMERICAN ...
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You can view all of the News of the Weird at http://www.newsoftheweird.com/
(We have removed actual News of the Weird items to avoid possible copyright infringement.)
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Meet Pinky...
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A brief excerpt from the 2002 video release "Robin Williams Live on Broadway"… Note: This clip contains coarse language (but with a nifty Scottish accent)
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by Curtis Wiggins I have a friend who is starting a new job soon. I just had a dream where I was concerned about whether or not he would like this new morning radio show we were ...
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On a recent transatlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning. One woman in ...
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The proper way to pronounce "Oklahoma" is ...

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Every year, English teachers from across the country can submit their collections of actual similes and metaphors found in high school essays. These excerpts are published each ...
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When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know...
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The answer to the last question, for anyone left wondering...
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Imagine a Victorian-era British major-general. He is a military man, an explorer, a scholar, a scientist, an artist, et cetera. He's the type of guy that straps on a pith helmet to go stomping around Africa ...
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What do Liechtenstein and Uzbekistan have in common?
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A man took his wife to the rodeo and one of the exhibits is that of breeding
bulls.
They went up to the first pen and there was a sign that said, "This bull
mated 50 times ...
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