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Added 1/1/1990
Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.
Man who run in front of car get tired.
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
...
Added 1/1/1990
One morning while making breakfast, a man walked up to his wife
and pinched her on her butt and said "You know, if you firmed this
up, we could get rid of your girdle". While ...
Added 1/1/1990
Have you ever wondered where the phrase "You gotta be sh*ttin' me" came from? Well, it just so happens to have originated through the Father of the USA.
Way back, George ...
Added 1/1/1990
This answers the age old question of why do we have to do it this way?
Origins of engineering specs and government decisions.
Ever wonder where engineering specifications ...
Added 1/1/1990
Reuters
Monday January 8 8:35 AM ET
Woman Who Bit Off Testicle Is Jailed
LONDON (Reuters) - A British woman who bit off the testicle of her best friend's husband's in a ...
Added 1/1/1990
Oxymorons
"Thank God I'm an Atheist"
"This page intentionally left blank"
A little big
A new classic
Academic sorority
Act naturally
Advanced BASIC
Aerobic ...
Added 1/1/1990
Brenda and Steve took their six-year-old son to the doctor. With some hesitation, they explained that although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned ...
Added 1/1/1990
A woman went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00. "Why so little," she asked the pet store owner.
The ...
Added 1/1/1990
So there's this fella with a parrot. And this parrot swears
like a sailor, I mean he's a pistol. He can swear for five minutes
straight without repeating himself. Trouble is, ...
Added 1/1/1990
A woman was having a passionate affair with an inspector from a pest control company. One afternoon they were carrying on in the bedroom together when her husband arrived home ...
Added 1/1/1990
A little boy is at school one day and while he is gone, his cat is killed in traffic. His mother is very concerned about how he will take the news. Upon his arrival home, she ...
Added 1/1/1990
The following is a direct quote from the Center for Strategic and International Studies report on GLOBAL ORGANIZED CRIME; the author who introduces the story swears it's true.
...
Added 1/1/1990
Monday October 8 7:14 AM ET
Police Use Helicopter for Doughnut Run
ALBUQUERQUE (Reuters) - An Albuquerque policeman and his pilot face disciplinary measures after using a ...
Added 1/1/1990
To ensure we Americans never offend anyone - particularly fanatics intent on killing us - airport screeners will not be allowed to profile people. They will continue random ...
Added 1/1/1990
How do you get a Nun pregnant?
Dress her up like a choirboy
Added 1/1/1990
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing ...
Added 1/1/1990
What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?
Snowballs.
What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?
They both like a tight seal.
If a light sleeper ...
Added 1/1/1990
What do you get if you put the Spice Girls in the toaster?
Pop tarts.
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist?
He sold his soul to Santa
Did you hear about the guy ...
Added 1/1/1990
A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism.
- Carl Sagan
Added 1/1/1990
"Sure I've got one. It's a perfect twenty-twenty."
- Duane Thomas, Dallas Cowboys halfback,
answering a question on whether he has an IQ
Added 1/1/1990
"[Some parents] want their Ambers and their Alexanders to
grow up in a cozy womb of non-competition, where everybody
shares tofu, and Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad ...
Added 1/1/1990
"I think he just flew too close to the tower,"
- Harnett County North Carolina Sheriff Larry Knott, explaining what happened when a small plane crashed into an 1800 foot tower. ...
Added 1/1/1990
"People thought this would be an award show - but we couldn't get anybody to open up the envelopes. I've been backstage at a lot of rock concerts, and I've never seen musicians run ...
Added 1/1/1990
"As an Olympic commentator, John Tesh is a great piano player"
- Bob Costas
"I think Bob Costas needs a spanking"
- John Tesh
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