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Added 4/27/1998
TEMPERATURE OF HELL
This is forwarded from a graduate of the University of Oklahoma School of
Chemical Engineering Dept. Citing one of Dr. Schlambaugh's final test
questions ...
Added 4/25/1998
21 Very Short Books
1) A Guide to Arab Democracies
2) A Journey through the Mind of Dennis Rodman
3) Amelia Earhart's Guide to the Pacific Ocean
4) Career ...
Added 4/21/1998
10 WORDS THAT DON'T EXIST, BUT SHOULD:
1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks' trus) adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.
2. CARPERPETUATION ...
Added 4/21/1998
OXYMORON LIST (April 1998)
(Oxymoron - - an epigrammatic witty, often paradoxical effect, by which contradictory terms are used in conjunction)
50. Act naturally
49. Found ...
Added 4/20/1998
REMEMBER WHEN....
A computer was something on TV
from a science fiction show.
A window was something you hated to clean
and RAM was the cousin of a goat.
MEG was ...
Added 4/19/1998
Two men are in a locker room. One notices the other has a cork in
his rectum. He says, "How'd you get a cork in you rectum?"
"I was walking along the beach and I tripped over ...
Added 4/17/1998
IMAGINE IF INSTEAD OF CRYPTIC, GEEKY TEXT STRINGS,
YOUR COMPUTER PRODUCED ERROR MESSAGES IN HAIKU...
A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.
- ...
Added 4/17/1998
Please ready the following survey titled "Are you a Man?"...
1. In the company of feminists, coitus should be referred to as:
a) lovemaking
b) screwing
c) the pigskin ...
Added 4/16/1998
Jesus joined a threesome on the first hole. The drive had to be hit
over two small lakes to reach a green surrounded by sandtraps.
Jesus said "OK, I'll do this one. If Palmer ...
Added 4/16/1998
"My friend," said St. Peter to the recently deceased, "you did lead
an exemplary life on earth-but there is one instance of your taking
the name of The Lord in vain. Would you ...
Added 4/16/1998
A man asks his wife the following questions after a long discussion
about her life if he were to die before her.
Husband: "Honey, if I were to die before you, would you ...
Added 4/16/1998
Jesus, Moses and God were out playing golf one day. Jesus teed
off first, and the ball flew straight over the fairway, landed in the
green and rolled to within a couple feet of ...
Added 4/15/1998
A foursome was on the last hole and when the last golfer drove off the tee he hooked into a cow pasture. He advised his friends to play through and he would meet them at the ...
Added 4/14/1998
There were three men drinking in a bar, a doctor, an attorney and a biker. As the doctor was drinking his white wine he said, "For Valentine's Day I'm going to buy my wife a fur ...
Added 4/14/1998
Frequently Asked Questions for Etch-A-Sketch Technical Support
Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has all of these funny little lines all over the screen.
A: Pick it up and shake it.
...
Added 4/14/1998
Tips for Northerners moving South
1. Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later how
to use it.
2. If you forget a Southerner's name, refer to him (or ...
Added 4/13/1998
Interesting but mindless trivia ...
Did you know that.....?
Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches
A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
...
Added 4/13/1998
COMPUTER, POWER STRIP I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not ...
Added 4/10/1998
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the ...
Added 4/6/1998
A young couple are on their way to Vegas to get married. Before getting there, the girl said to the guy that she has a confession to make. The reason that they have not been ...
Added 4/4/1998
A man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells him ...
Added 4/3/1998
A worried father confronted his daughter one night. "I don't like that
new boyfriend, he's rough and common and bloody stupid with it."
"Oh no, Daddy," the daughter replied, ...
Added 4/2/1998
This guy from out of town walks into a local bar for a
drink. After about 2 steps, he realizes he's in a gay bar,
but he thinks, "What the heck, all I really want is a beer." ...
Added 3/31/1998
News from Hopkins Medical Center......
Yesterday research scientists revealed that beer contains
small traces of female hormones.
To prove their theory, the scientists fed ...
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