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Added 8/5/1998
Sven was going for his morning walk one day when he walked past Ole's house and saw a sign that said, "Boat For Sale."
This confused Sven because he knew that Ole didn't own a ...
Added 8/5/1998
1. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm
2. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines
3. Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets ...
Added 8/5/1998
Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. They loaded up Jack's
station wagon and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they
got caught in a terrible blizzard. They ...
Added 8/4/1998
Two buddies were sitting at the bar in a singles' club
and talking about another guy who was sitting at the
other end of the bar.
"I don't get it," complained the first guy, ...
Added 8/3/1998
Four Habits of Highly Effective People
1. Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with
documents in their hands look like hardworking employees ...
Added 8/3/1998
God one day decided to check in on Adam to see how things were going.
"Adam... How are things going?"
Adam replies that he considers himself quite fortunate to be living in ...
Added 8/2/1998
WILL HE JUMP?
A blonde and brunette were watching the 6 o'clock news. The news was
about a man about ready to jump off a bridge. The brunette turns to the
blonde and says " ...
Added 8/2/1998
Mike Tyson is in bed with a girl, and he says, "My life's a disaster. I was born to an under-privileged
family, had a rough childhood, I was thrown in jail for rape, my wife left ...
Added 7/30/1998
API - Time Magazine reports an interesting case of high-tech graffiti. It
seems that a couple of Intel engineers working on the design of a recent
version of the Pentium ...
Added 7/29/1998
A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some
money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.
She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind ...
Added 7/29/1998
Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners. He turns a corner and sees a building with the sign, "Hans ...
Added 7/27/1998
FUN THOUGHTS
1. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
3. I doubt, therefore I might be.
4. ...
Added 7/23/1998
A woman wants the inside of her house painted, so she calls a contractor
In to help her. They wander around the house, and she points out the colors
she wants. She says, "Now ...
Added 7/23/1998
Some things you just can't explain
A farmer is sitting in the neighbourhood bar getting soused. A
man comes in and asks the farmer, "Hey, why are you sitting here
on this ...
Added 7/22/1998
- If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
- A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
- Experience is something you don't get ...
Added 7/21/1998
A Captain's Tale Long ago lived a seaman named Captain Bravo. He was a manly-man who showed no fear in facing his enemies. One day, while sailing the seven seas, a ...
Added 7/20/1998
Heavenly Entrance Exam
The day finally arrived: Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven.
He is met at the Pearly Gates by Saint Peter himself. The gates are
closed, however, ...
Added 7/16/1998
THE TECHNO TERMS DICTIONARY
486 - The average IQ needed to understand a PC.
State-of-the-art - Any computer you can't afford.
Obsolete - Any computer you own.
...
Added 7/16/1998
Three mice are sitting at a bar in a pretty rough neighborhood
late at night trying to impress each other about how tough they
are.
The first mouse pounds a shot of scotch, ...
Added 7/14/1998
A complaint was received by the Pontiac Division of General Motors:
"This is the second time I have written you, and I don't blame you for not answering me, because I kind of ...
Added 7/13/1998
"Lunch"
An Irishman, a Mexican and a redneck were doing construction work on
scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and
the Irishman said, ...
Added 7/13/1998
A shy gentleman was preparing to board a plane when he
heard that the Pope was on the same flight. "This is
exciting," thought the gentleman. "I've always been a big fan
of ...
Added 7/7/1998
Redneck Family Tree
Many many years ago when I was twenty three,
I got married to a widow who was pretty as could be.
This widow had a grown-up daughter
Who had hair ...
Added 7/1/1998
John Doe, my assistant programmer, can always be found
hard at work in his cubicle. John works independently,without
wasting company time talking to colleagues. John never
...
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