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Bill Clinton, Al Gore and George W. Bush died and found themselves standing on the other side of the Jordan River, looking across at the promised land.
The Archangel Michael was ...
THE JUGGLER AND THE POLICEMAN
A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police. "What are these matches and lighter fluid doing in your car?" asks the cop. ...
A lady in her late 40's went to a plastic surgeon for a face lift.
The doctor told her of a new procedure called "The Knob." This small knob
is planted on the back of a ...
I pulled into a crowded mall parking lot and rolled down the car windows to make sure my Labrador Retriever had fresh air. She was stretched out on the back seat, and I wanted to ...
Harmless? If you always thought those little green garden snakes were O.K., read on:
Green Garden Grass snakes can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes. A couple in ...
Defense Attorney: What is your age?
Little Old Woman: I am 86 years old.
Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened to you?
Little Old Woman: ...
A little know fact that most engineers, technicians and auto mechanics overlook is the magic of smoke.
Yes, smoke.
It is the guts of most everything that works.........
...
The universal compensation for buddies who help you Move is beer.
Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but
not both. That's just plain mean. ...
A woman was trying to do her laundry one day, when her washing machine
suddenly broke down. Distraught, she called her husband at the office and said,
"Honey, can you please ...
An artist, a lawyer, and a computer scientist are discussing the merits of a mistress.
An artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with the risk of being discovered. ...
John woke up one morning immensely aroused so
he turned over to his wife's side of the bed. His wife,
Heather, had already awakened though, and she
was downstairs preparing ...
A mortician was working late one night. It was his job to examine
the dead bodies before they were sent off to be buried or cremated.
As he examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, ...
The Mysteries of Life
1. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
2. Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
3. Why can't women put ...
The New Survivor Show
Have you heard about the next planned "Survivor" show?
6 men will be dropped on an island with 1 van and 4 kids each, for 6
weeks.
Each kid plays ...
A fierce tribe of warriors captured a Frenchman,an Englishman, and a New Yorker.The chief comes to them and says, "The bad news is that now that we've caught you, we're going to ...
Note: Unlike many such things, this really is a true story. You can
hear the audio clip at http://www.snopes2.com/radiotv/audio/newlywed.rm
Just think, where would we be
An old lady in a nursing home is wheeling up and down the halls in
her wheelchair making sounds like she's driving a car. As she's going
down the hall an old man jumps out of a ...
An old farmer in South Georgia had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice, with picnic tables, horseshoe courts and some apple trees. ...
Setting Company Policy........
Start with a cage containing five apes. In the cage, hang a banana on a string and put stairs under it. Before long, an ape will go to the stairs ...
A paratrooper calls his dad after his first day of paratrooping. His dad
asks "So, did you jump?" He says "I will get to that."
When he was airborne the drill captain opened ...
A guy arrives at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted. St. Peter is leafing through the Big Book to see if the guy is worthy of entering. After several minutes, St. Peter ...
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a
perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together
was, of course, perfect. One snowy, stormy ...
Dear Friends:
It is with the saddest heart that I have to pass on the following news.
Please join me in remembering a great icon. Veteran Pillsbury
spokesperson, The ...
A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures
on the sea. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook,
and an eye patch.
The seaman asks ...
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