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GOOD HELP IS HARD TO FIND

Added 1/16/2000
AND WE WONDER WHY GOOD HELP IS HARD TO FIND! Can you imagine working at the following Company? It has a little over 500 employees with the following statistics: 29 have ...

Andy Rooney

Added 1/12/2000
from Andy Rooney  On Ads In Bills:  Have you ever noticed that they put advertisements in with your bills now? Like bills aren't distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk ...

What were they thinking

Added 1/7/2000
Personally, I don't know which is more bizarre: The fact that the ad agency thought they could get away with this ad, or that Reuters found it necessary to explain to its ...

Statistics

Added 1/6/2000
A recent article in the Seattle Post-Intelligencer concerning accidental deaths caused by physicians from research of Laura Key USA. This triggered a chain of thought that ...

Shopping

Added 1/4/2000
Things to do while your spouse or significant other is taking his/her sweet time shopping: 1. Get boxes of condoms and randomly place them in other people's shopping carts ...

Spots

Added 1/4/2000

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A REDNECK WHEN...

Added 1/3/2000
YOU KNOW YOU'RE A REDNECK WHEN... 1. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse. 2. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner ...

VIRUSES

Added 12/26/1999
BE ON THE LOOK OUT FOR THE FOLLOWING VIRUSES: CLINTON VIRUS Gives you a 7 Inch Hard Drive with NO memory. VIAGRA VIRUS Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy. ...

Lack of Tact

Added 12/20/1999
Tact Three guys were working on a high rise building project: Steve, Bill and Charlie. Steve falls off and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, ...

REJECTION LINES

Added 12/16/1999
Top 10 Rejection Lines Given By Women (and what they actually mean) 10. I think of you as a brother. (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in Deliverance.") ...

Basic rules for driving in the Metro Detroit Area

Added 12/14/1999
1. A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the left lane waiting for the same jerks to ...

Have an Extra-Specially Fun Time At Wal-Mart!

Added 12/14/1999
1. Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they don't realize it.  2. Set all the alarm clocks to go ...

Girlfriend remote

Added 12/14/1999
Finally! Technology has come through with something really useful.
girlfriend remote

Cat joke

Added 12/13/1999
Little Timmy was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbour peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, "What ...

A Southern Christmas

Added 12/9/1999
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the shack, not a thing was a movin', from the front to the back, The kids were in bed, I believe we had nine, ...

Great White Throne

Added 12/9/1999
Bill Clinton, Bill Gates, and Al Gore were in an airplane that crashed. They're up in heaven, and God's sitting on the great white throne. God addressed Al first. "Al, what do ...

Where Are You

Added 12/9/1999
1. One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: Chicago. 2. One hand on wheel, one finger out window: New York. 3. One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all ...

Is there a heaven

Added 12/6/1999
A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other of the after life. The woman's biggest fear was that there was no heaven. After a long life, ...

What you didn't learn in school

Added 12/6/1999
For high school and college graduates, here is a list of 11 things they did not learn in school. In his book, Bill Gates talks about how feel-good, politically correct ...

A GENERATION IN BETWEEN

Added 12/2/1999
After all those jokes about from the Boomers, finally here is one for those folks in between. You're stuck between the Baby Boomers and Generations X'ers if... 1. You ...

Philosophy of Drinking

Added 12/2/1999
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. - Frank Sinatra The problem with some people ...

Gifts for men

Added 11/30/1999
Gifts for men Buying gifts for men is not nearly as complicated as it is for women. Follow these rules and you should have no problems. Rule #1: When in doubt - buy him ...

Jig saw puzzle

Added 11/23/1999
One morning this blonde calls her friend and says, "Please come over and help me. I have this killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to start it." Her friend asks, ...

Sample

Added 11/23/1999
A 75-year old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring me back a sample tomorrow." The ...

 

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