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Calling in Sick
Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable because no matter how
legitimate my illness, I always sense my boss thinks I am lying. On one
occasion I had a ...
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Seen on the back of a biker's vest: If you can read this, my wife fell off.
Horn Broken, Watch for Finger
If you can read this, please flip me back over... (seen upside down, ...
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A blonde woman competed with a brunette
woman and a redheaded woman in the Breast
Stroke division of an English Channel swim
competition. The brunette came in first,
the ...
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THINGS YOU WOULD NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERNER SAY:
Duct Tape won't fix that.
Wrasslin's fake.
No kids in the back of the pickup, it's not safe.
Lisa Marie was lucky to ...
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The following are actual stories told by travel agents (and you wonder why US citizens generally score less than the rest of the world on geography)...
I had someone who wanted ...
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The following are actual statements made during court cases:
Judge: I know you, don't I?
Defendant: Uh, yes.
Judge: All right, tell me, how do I know you?
Defendant: ...
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New Australian version of Windows...
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by Curtis Wiggins
There used to be a time when working on a car was simple. At least a little simpler than rocket science or brain surgery. I can remember when I could open the ...
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by Curtis Wiggins
I swore to myself that I wasn't going to do this. I swore I would not write anything about John and Lorena Bobbett and their tendency to cut off body parts. ...
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Here at the Phineas T. Manbottle Library of Arcane Knowledge and Questionable Humor we try very hard to avoid being politically correct. ...
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by Curtis Wiggins This is a paraphrased recollection of an actual conversation I had with my mother when I was about four or five… Me: What’s an easter egg hunt? Mom: We take ...
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Some Important Theological Questions are Answered if we think of God as a Computer Programmer. Q: Does God control everything that happens in my life? A: He could, if he used the ...
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You know you're a Floridian if... Socks are only for bowling. You never use an umbrella because you know the rain will be over in five minutes. A good parking place has ...
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Some people are like Slinkies. Not really good for anything, But they ...
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How many active volcanoes are in the United States?
(For the purposes of this question, count only volcanoes that are
"historically active", i.e. volcanoes that have a written ...
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True bravery is a guy arriving home late after a boy's night out, being assaulted by his wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: "You still cleaning, or are you gonna be ...
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ABBOTT: Fry's Electronics. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up a home office in the den, and I'm thinking of buying a computer.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the ...
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When were the words "under God" added to the Pledge of Allegiance?
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Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization?
Answer: Princess Diana's death.
Question: How come?
Answer: An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend ...
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