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MICROSOFT VIRGIN
Did you hear about the woman who was married to a succession of three
Microsoft employees and still died a virgin?
Her first husband was in Training, and ...
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One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.
Finally he decided the animal was old, and ...
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It's "Let's pick on men instead of blondes" time...
What do you call a handcuffed man?............Trustworthy.
What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath ...
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and the moral of the story is.....
One day at the end of class little Johnny's teacher has the class go home and think of story and then conclude with the moral of that story. ...
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Q: What do Bin Laden and Hiroshima have in common?
A: Nothing... yet.
Q: How do you play Taliban bingo?
A: B-52... F-16... B-1...
Q: What is the Taliban's national ...
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President Clinton and the Pope died on the same day, and due to an
administrative foul up, Clinton was sent to heaven and the Pope was
sent to hell.
The Pope explained the ...
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Microsoft complies with "truth in advertising" requirements...
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Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their retirement home
reminiscing. The first lady recalled shopping at the green grocers and
demonstrated with her hands, the ...
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There was a blond bowling team and a brunette bowling team and they
rented a double decker bus to take them to the bowling alley. The blond
team sat in the upper level, and the ...
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In the seventh century, Queen Etheldrida of Northumbria developed a throat tumor, which she regarded as divine punishment for her life of extravagance. Before her death, she ...
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Have you ever wished you could remember Norm's greetings on Cheers?
1. "What's shaking Norm?"
"All four cheeks & a couple of chins."
2. "What's new Normie?"
...
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After all those jokes about from the Boomers, finally here is one
for those folks in between.
You're stuck between the Baby Boomers and Generations X'ers if...
1. You ...
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WORDS OF WISDOM
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal the neighbor's ...
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These quotes were taken from actual performance evaluations:
"Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has
started to dig."
"His men would follow him ...
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Did you hear about the new 3 Million dollar Arkansas State lottery?
The winner gets 3 dollars a year for a million years.
++++++++++++++
What does a divorce in ...
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DEEP THOUGHTS...
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
Atheism is a nonprophet organization.
If ...
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Jesus, Moses and God were out playing golf one day. Jesus teed
off first, and the ball flew straight over the fairway, landed in the
green and rolled to within a couple feet of ...
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An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of
Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out
of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes ...
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Billy, a good, normal ten-year-old boy, and his parents set down to select a summer camp for Billy. There were the usual camps with swimming, canoeing, games, singing by the ...
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Some WIN95 humor....
Bill Gates dies in a car accident.
He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by St. Peter.
"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not ...
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10. When they ask "How are you today?" Tell them! "I'm so glad you
asked because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these
problems; my arthritis is acting up, my ...
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100 FUN WAYS TO PHONE IN A PIZZA ORDER
1. If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
2. Make up a ...
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