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1. Your Houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. 3. You keep more food than beer in the ...
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Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I
look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of
their hopes and dreams. ...
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AUDI
Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
BMW
Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
BUICK
Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer
CHEVROLET
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, ...
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A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes
over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day the
woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her ...
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1. Your potted plants are alive. And you can't smoke a single one of them.
2. Having sex in a twin-sized bed is absurd.
3. You keep more food than beer or wine in the fridge. ...
Viewed 11 times
20) Can't stick their heads out of Windows '95.
19) Fetch command not available on all platforms.
18) Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side.
17) Too ...
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A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the
second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks
nothing of it and is about to ...
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by Curtis Wiggins I have had a dream come true. First time that's happened to me, at least that I am aware of. It wasn't a very good dream, nothing to do with world peace, ...
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When I was a child, I had a dream that I looked up at the stars, and in the stars I saw the answer. THE answer, the ultimate answer to everything. It was perfect, it was beautiful, ...
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From me ("the Wishor") to you (hereinafter called the "Wishee"): Please accept without obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially ...
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When engineer David Bradley said "I may have invented it, but Bill Gates made it famous", to what was he referring?
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A business owner in Texas was confused about paying an invoice minus the
early payment discount, so he decided to ask his secretary for some
mathematical help. He called her ...
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Who said "A sewer worker is like a brain surgeon. We're both specialists."
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Just wanted to warn everyone there's a new virus
-code name is "Work." If you receive "Work" from
your colleagues, your boss, or any one else, do not
touch "Work" under any ...
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A blonde is going on her first trip overseas. She drives all the way to
Miami to apply for a passport. In the passport office, the government
official sees that she is visibly ...
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Little Johnny and Susie are only ten years old, but they're sure they're in
love and decided they wanted to get married.
Little Johnny bravely approached Susie's father and ...
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Why is September 3rd, 1752 an unusual date in American history?
(hint: Happy New Year! ...and no, it's not Dick Clark's birthday)
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1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL.
2. The sport of choice for the maintenance level employees is BOWLING.
3. The sport of choice for front-line workers ...
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It's a good thing I was born a woman, or I'd have been a drag queen.
- Dolly Parton
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After all those jokes about from the Boomers, finally here is one
for those folks in between.
You're stuck between the Baby Boomers and Generations X'ers if...
1. You ...
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Some of you have voiced that Engineers are a different breed....Perhaps the
following will help you understand us.....
Comprehending Engineers - Take One
Two engineering ...
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A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered.
Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that
would transfer a portion of the ...
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How about never? Is never good for you?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change ...
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