Humor
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Accuracy Movement Spreading to Other Memorials
Jan 17, 2002
(NEW YORK) The New York City Fire Department commissioned a statue of the famous photo of three firemen hoisting an ...
Q. What do you call a virgin on a waterbed?
A: A cherry float.
Q: What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
A: 1 US leader
Q: What did the sign on the ...
A Scottish old-timer in Scotland, in a bar, says to a young man, "Lad, look
out there to the field. Do ya see that fence? Look how well it's built. I
built that fence stone by ...
There was this couple that had been married for 20 years.
Every time they made love the husband always insisted on
shutting off the lights.
Well, after 20 years the wife ...
A paratrooper calls his dad after his first day of paratrooping. His dad
asks "So, did you jump?" He says "I will get to that."
When he was airborne the drill captain opened ...
Husbands, please take note!
Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a
man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands.
...
"No, no, you didn't! Your sister was in there!"
- Marvin Tippery, to his sister Judy Money, upon hearing that she had just
returned the decorative box he gave her for ...
Merry Christmas From Mom
Dear Darling Son and That Person You Married,
Merry Christmas to you, and please don't worry. I'm just fine considering I
can't breathe or eat. The ...
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an
environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive,
gender neutral, ...
Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else around here knows HOW to change a light bulb! They ...
For all of you out there who've had to deal with an irate customer, this
is for you. An award should go to the United Airlines agent in Denver for
being smart and funny, while ...
An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat
on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind.
A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, ...
Based on a bet by the other members of his threesome, Everett Sanchez tried
to wash his own "balls" in a ball washer at the local golf course. Proving
once again that beer ...
1. If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out.
2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going ...
Dear Santa: Listen you fat little troll, I've been helping you out every year, playing at being the perfect Christmas present, wearing skimpy bathing suits in frigid ...
Here is some good news on proper dieting...
Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats and ...
Lions football practice was delayed on Monday for nearly two hours.
One of the players, while on his way to the locker room happened to look
down and noticed a suspicious ...
If you take an Oriental man and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes? ...
OUTSIDE: As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
INSIDE: That you're not here to ruin it for me.
OUTSIDE: If I get only one thing for Christmas...
INSIDE: I ...
Your ass is never a factor in a job interview
Your orgasms are always real
Your last name stays put
The garage is all yours
Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow
...
'Hi, Jack' on plane triggers SWAT team by Shawn D. Lewis / The Detroit News ( http://detnews.com/ ) Waterford - Pilots named Jack, beware. Minutes after a boarding ...
Mrs. Ashley telephoned the headquarters of the infantry near Great Oaks, her
ancestral home. "This is Mrs. Chauncey
Ashley the Third, and with Thanksgiving coming up, I thought ...
A guy walks into a doctor's office and stutters, "Da-da-doc, I've ba-ba-been sta-sta-stuttering for ye-ye-years, and I ca-ca-can't stand it anymo-mo-more! Can you he-he-help me?" ...
Little Johnny and Susie are only ten years old, but they're sure they're in
love and decided they wanted to get married.
Little Johnny bravely approached Susie's father and ...
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