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Quick Ones 3

Added 11/23/2003
A recent study found out which days men prefer to have sex. It was found that men preferred to engage in sexual activity on the days that started with the letter "T"'. For ...

The First Christmas Joke of the Season

Added 11/23/2003
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "you must each possess something that ...

The Dick Van Dyke Show

Added 11/23/2003
Aside from Dick Van Dyke, who was originally considered for the lead role on "The Dick Van Dyke Show"?

Love Story

Added 11/17/2003
I SHALL SEEK AND FIND YOU... I SHALL TAKE YOU TO BED AND HAVE MY WAY WITH YOU... I WILL MAKE YOU ACHE, SHAKE AND SWEAT UNTIL YOU MOAN AND GROAN. I WILL MAKE YOU BEG FOR ...

Quote (2)

Added 11/17/2003
Who said "A sewer worker is like a brain surgeon. We're both specialists."

How did we survive

Added 11/13/2003
According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 40's, 50's, 60's, 70's probably shouldn't have survived. Our baby cribs were covered with ...

Rhoticism

Added 11/9/2003
What is rhoticism?

Boot Camp

Added 11/7/2003
LETTER FROM A FARM KID, NOW AT SAN DIEGO MARINE CORPS RECRUIT DEPOT Dear Ma and Pa: I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats ...

Only in America

Added 11/6/2003
A man is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull. He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He succeeds in ...

How teaching math has evolved

Added 11/5/2003
Teaching Math in 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit? Teaching Math in 1960: A logger ...

Seven Degrees of Being Blonde

Added 11/3/2003
FIRST DEGREE A married couple was asleep when the phone rang. The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment And said, "How should I know, that's 200 ...

Elvis has left the building

Added 11/3/2003
When and where did the phrase "Elvis has left the building" originate?

One-liners

Added 10/26/2003
The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist. I'd rather die living than live dying. In democracy it's your vote that counts; In feudalism, it's your ...

Dead Corporate Mascots

Added 10/26/2003
What are the names of the corporate mascots in the Mark Ryden painting "Dead Characters"? 
Dead Characters

Generic name for Viagra

Added 10/22/2003
In pharmacology, all drugs have two names; a trade name and a generic name.For example, the trade name of Tylenol has a generic name of acetaminophen. Aleve is also called ...

Blonde Joke

Added 10/19/2003
A girl was visiting her blonde friend who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was ...

Clever Lawyer

Added 10/19/2003
A defendant was on trial for murder. There was strong evidence indicating guilt, but there was no corpse. In the defense's closing statement the lawyer, knowing that his client ...

Patron Saints

Added 10/19/2003
Who is the patron saint of television?

Pain

Added 10/14/2003
A young redhead goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me." She takes her finger and ...

Larry and the Travel Agent

Added 10/12/2003
Larry goes to see his travel agent. The conversation goes something like this... "Hey Larry, going away on vacation again?" "Yes, but I need to ask for something different." ...

Acting Governors

Added 10/12/2003
What three movies featured appearances by both Jesse Ventura and Arnold Schwarzenegger, the then future governors of Minnesota and California, respectively?

Community Service

Added 10/7/2003
One day a florist goes for a haircut. After the cut, he goes to pay the barber and the barber replies: "I am sorry. I cannot accept money from you, I am doing community service." ...

The Ugly Bus

Added 10/6/2003
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. When get to meet their maker, because of the grief they have experienced, God decides ...

Chef Boyardee

Added 10/6/2003
What was Chef Boyardee's first name?

 

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