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I could SO not be Amish

by Curtis Wiggins


Monday night (Labor Day), a storm blew through here.  Typical Florida storm, but...  In one instant there was a bright flash, and a really LOUD boom, and all the lights went out.  It got real, real dark. 

I didn't think about it before then, but it's been a really long time since we lost power that wasn't during a hurricane.  And a hurricane is different because we always have people with us, and there's lots going on, and we sit around and eat and drink and play cards and watch the flying debris outside. 

This was just me and Kat at home, nothing going on, and just a piddly, boring little storm outside.  I swear to God within 10 minutes I was bored out of my mind. 

I asked Kat how people did it, living with no electricity.  She said it was about 9:30, so the Amish were in bed already.  After all they had to get up at four in the morning to do farm stuff.

I could so not be Amish.

If you were Amish, you'd be wakened at 4 a.m., whether you liked it or not, by cows mooing loudly to be milked, dogs snuffing at your bedside (or in your face) letting you know it was time to get up and open the door for them, roosters letting you know it was nearly daylight, and assorted other domestic critter noises.  Plus you'd be freezing your buns off, so it wouldn't be that pleasant in bed anyway.  So you wouldn't be asleep and might as well get up to shovel the snow off your bed, build a fire to warm up your frozen toes and fingers, and go feed them beasties to make 'em hush, so you could go back to bed and get some shut eye.  Of course, by the time you did all that, you might be in the mood for a belly full of biscuits and gravy.

The Amish go to bed when it gets dark and they wake up usely with or a little befor the sun, so the way i see it they prob sleep longer then me and you the other thing is that is the way that they choose to live, they dont have to pay an electric bill so that saves them money snd they also have as much milk, eggs and food that their fammilys could possibly need. they aslo know what is going into their food and where it comes from.