To live by
				
					
				
				
				
				Serenity Prayer 
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; 
The courage to change the things I cannot accept; 
And the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill 
today because they pissed me off. 
And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today as they 
may be connected to the ass I may have to kiss tomorrow.  Amen. 
Prayer of Thanks 
I want to thank you, Lord, for being close to me so far this day. 
With your help I haven't been impatient, lost my temper, been 
grumpy, judgmental or envious of anyone.  But I will be getting out of 
bed in a minute and I think I will really need your help then.  Amen.