New words
"A friend of mine in Los Angeles put his mind to the oft-experienced
problem of facing modern situations for which there are no existing
words or phrases in the English language. The following are his
suggestions for some situations to which we might all be able to relate."
arachnoleptic fit, n:
The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.
Beelzebug, n:
Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at 3 in
the morning and cannot be cast out.
bozone, n:
The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas
penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of
breaking down at any time in the future.
cashtration, n:
The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially
impotent for an indefinite period.
caterpallor, n:
The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're
eating.
dopelar effect, n:
(1) The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when you come at them
rapidly. (2) The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
come at you rapidly.
extraterrestaurant, n:
An eating place where you feel you've been abducted and experimented
on. Also known as ETry.
foreploy, n:
Any misrepresentation or outright lie about yourself that leads to
sex.
Grantartica, n:
The cold, isolated place where arts companies without funding dwell.
intaxication, n:
Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was
your money to start with.
kinstirpation, n:
A painful inability to get rid of relatives who come to visit.
lullabuoy, n:
An idea that keeps floating into your head and prevents you from
drifting off to sleep.
