Writing on the Walls
Friends don't let friends take home ugly men.
-- Women's restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE
Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" It's "Hi, how are you?"
-- Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia
No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up
with her shit.
-- Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, N. Carolina
A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have
trouble with it.
-- Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort, Dallas, Texas
Express Lane: Five beers or less.
-- Sign over one of the urinals, Ed Debevic's
You're too good for him.
-- Sign over mirror Women's room, Ed Debevics
No wonder you always go home alone.
-- Sign over mirror in Men's room, Ed Debevic's
The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open.
-- Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL
If you voted for Bush in the last election, you can't take a dump here. Your
asshole is in Washington.
-- Men's room Outback Steakhouse, Tacoma, Washington
Beauty is only a light switch away.
-- Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina
If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let's all get
wasted together and have the time of our lives.
-- Armand's Pizza, Washington, D.C.
Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die.
-- Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL
What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is in your hands.
-- Men's restroom, Lynagh's
