Knowledge
- If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
- A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
- Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
- For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
- He who hesitates is probably right.
- Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
- Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
- The colder the X-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.
- The hardness of the butter is proportional to the hardness of the bread.
- The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
- Don't sweat petty things...or pet sweaty things.
- Money can't buy love. But it CAN rent a very close imitation.
- Hell hath no fury like the lawyer of a woman scorned.
- Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
- The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.
- A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
- Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?
- What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
- OK so what's the speed of dark?
- Black holes are where God divided by zero.
- All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
