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The Manbottle Library  :  Humor  :  Laws of Physics

Laws of Physics


Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch, or you'll have  to pee.

Law of the  Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of the Telephone:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the  Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation  Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

Bath  Theorem:
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law  of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Theatre Rule:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law of  Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's  Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Rugs and Carpets:
The chances of an open-faced jam Sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

Law of Logical  Argument:
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Wilson's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making It.



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