The Weiner Olympics No 69 (original)
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Sunday, August 15, 2004 at 6:08 AM |
Every four years the Weiner Olympics are held on St. Bernard Day in Gotterdamarung whether it falls on a Monday or not.
I contacted the President of local the chapter in Woy Woy, Conrad Caninesky, for more information on this quadannual event that has become on international institution, what it is and why it is always held in Gutterdamarung.
His reply, "This event is to celebrate the birth of Sir Lady Spudholtz the founder of the Dachshund Dynasty. It is always held in Gotterdamarung, not only because it is her birthplace, but because climatic conditions, altitude and weather play a large part in determining record breaking Dachshund performances, and these conditions then remain constant.
"You mention the Dachshund Dynasty. Why is the Olympic contest not open to all comers?" I asked.
"As you would be well aware, it would be no contest to allow hounds of all persuasions to participate against each other as there is such a large variation in size and strength. Consider pitting a Chihuahua against a Great Dane in Sumo Wrestling, for instance. No.It is limited to the same breed."
"Just what events are included" I asked Mr. Caninesky.
"There is the "High Jump", the "Long Jump", the "Fetch the Stick", the "Roll Over",the "Shake Hands", the "Twenty Yard Dash", and others , including swimming events where only the Dog Paddle is allowed."
"What are the rewards for winning these events?"
"The first place winner, of course, wins the Gold Bone, followed by the Silver Bone and the Copper Bone. There was, at one time, the suggestion to award a Ham Bone instead to the first place winner, which has some merit and is till under consideration."
"What are some of the records for for these events?"
There is the world record time of 12.2 seconds for "Eat Your Dinner", 21 consecutive "Muddy Feet Sofa Jumping", 21.8 seconds "Snarl at the Paper Boy Dash", 12.6 "Lunges at the Postman", "Squirming During Grooming", and "Constant Barking Marathon" and too many more to mention.
I was going to ask when the next Weiner Olympics takes place so I can be sure to be out of town. But thought better of it in case I got bitten on the ankle.
-- Roy Spence 1997 (378) The Inquiring Observer
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Wednesday, September 27, 2017 at 7:49 AM |
There is the world record time of 12.2 seconds for "Eat Your Dinner", 21 consecutive "Muddy Feet Sofa Jumping", 21.8 seconds "Snarl at the Paper Boy Dash", 12.6 "Lunges at the Postman", "Squirming During Grooming", and "Constant Barking Marathon" and too many more to mention.
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